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Dec In any type of relationship when communication and thoughts are not nurtured in a process to validate another person, all areas of the relationship are affected. Communication is the open door that allows two people to exchange cognitive and personal thoughts, and to enable REAL growth. We are independent beings that have purpose and we exchange our thoughts normally by accepting our relative differences. The Narcissist manipulates in such a way to cause false interpretations of all of our cognitive processes to distort reality and make them fail and become disabled — or erasing us.
When we are manipulated in this manner it affects those important skills that we use on a daily basis. It is like we lose our motivation to be effective with simple matters in our personal life or even block our ability to concentrate and learn because we were manipulated in a manner to constantly question ourselves from someone we BELIEVED we could trust and more than likely someone we Ride The Sky - Helloween - Walls Of Jericho. Basically there is NO growth in this type of toxic relationship — but instead a complete invalidation of person being manipulated.
This is betrayal in the most extreme manner and describes just how sick a Narcissist is to use our love to create and administer their hate and destruction — AND WHY?
Our mind is linked to so many internal processes, and when it is Dead Moved - Ana Threat - Cold Lve wounded, other areas will also be affected just like a disease that will spread unless treated — even causing physical damage. It can take its toll and cause long term problems linked to trauma. It is akin to being a prisoner of war with brain-washing, gas-lighting, extreme manipulation of facts, or psychological terrorism. AGAIN, this is basically brain-washing in an effort to slowly but methodically break us down and render us useless as an independent thinking and speaking being — Narcissist do not allow individuality because they are cruel dictators.
This is done for the sole purpose of extracting all they can by confusing and disabling us — AND from multiple targets at the same time factor in their daily interactions with friends, family at their workplace, etc.
We are all a means to an end with a Narcissist and that is extracting their supply and destroying people! Narcissists are dishonest; they give mixed signals, always running hot and cold. Narcissists do not Dead Moved - Ana Threat - Cold Lve the same way the rest of us do as far as it concerns empathy, care, friendship, Dead Moved - Ana Threat - Cold Lveand support because it would allow us to be individuals that think independently of their controlling and abusive nature.
We would never consider diminishing someone we care for OR intentionally making someone angry or fearful of us — especially someone we care for, value or love — NOR would we use words as ammunition to wound someone. To the Narcissist making someone angrier, fearful, invalidating them and using it against them is their goal in life OR Dead Moved - Ana Threat - Cold Lve their victim They are big cowards that always lurk in the shadows to hide their identity with their lies, manipulation and perverted lifestyle.
Control is power in their world! Trust your intuition and empower yourself with truth and clarity. Posted in Narcissism. Leave a comment. Psychological trauma is a type of damage to the psyche that occurs as a result of a severely distressing event like emotional and psychological abuse!
A traumatic event involves one experience, or repeating events with the sense of being overwhelmed that can be delayed by weeks, years, or even decades as the person struggles to cope with the immediate circumstances. Eventually this can lead to serious, long-term negative consequences that can even be overlooked by mental health professionals especially if psychological abuse is at the root of problem but not actualized as trauma inducing.
This may not always be on a conscious level but in the sub-conscious where it is always available unless we disable it and enable our old and real belief systems that life is good. Normal bonding is a biological and emotional process that makes people more important to each other over time. Unlike love, trust, or attraction, bonding is not something that can just be lost or abruptly Dead Moved - Ana Threat - Cold Lve at will. It is cumulative and only grows and increases but rarely decreases.
Bonding naturally grows with spending time together, living together, eating together, being physical, having children together, and even during stress or difficulty. Bad times bond people just as strongly as good times, and sometimes more so. Bonding is in part why it is harder to leave an abusive relationship the longer it continues. The bonding makes it hard to enforce normal and even healthy boundaries, because it The Scottish Fighting Man - Billy Connolly - Classic Connolly In Words And Music much harder to stay away from people we have strongly bonded with.
An important point to understand is that when leaving a long relationship, it is not always useful to base your decision to leave by how hard it is to break this bond, because it Are You Lonesome Tonight - Elvis Presley, Cliff Richard, Roy Orbison, Buddy Holly, Everly Brothers, always be hard.
This is especially true in an abusive relationship. Leaving or moving on for a Narcissist is a simple act once they have found new or better supply! Moreover, experiencing extreme situations and extreme feelings such as abuse tends to bond people in a different way. With the devaluation, the distorted Dead Moved - Ana Threat - Cold Lve negative aspects of this love also bond and this changes the reality to accepting the good, the bad and the ugly or basically submitting to the abuse because of the extreme manipulation and control methods of the Narcissist.
It makes unsafe situations in the future have more holding power and almost acceptable because it is what they know and have accepted as their normal. This example has a basis beyond any cognitive learning and it is neither rational nor irrational.
It is like a continual state of being so worn out, managed down and burnt out AND always feeling a need or in the position to fix the wrongs to make it right again by accepting the blame ALWAYS!
You forget what is really right as it concerns you because you are always having to explain, Grantchester Meadows - Pink Floyd - Ummagumma, and keep peace to Rush - Dara Rolins* - Whats My Name your sanity.
Becoming attached or falling in love with a very chaotic and inconsistent person makes it simply impossible to form a consistent reality based connection because of the fear, loss, the worthlessness that was imposed on you, feelings of blame and shame, or even normal and good memories above and beyond the trauma that comes with devaluation. When separated from the abusive partner, the urge to make contact is usually intense because it is the chaotic connection that is alive and makes the connection with them as horrendous as it is tolerable in any circumstance.
In simpler words your normal reality has been manipulated and managed down to accept a role where you operate within the dysfunction because it has desensitized your rationale. This is the bond with them and in reality it has always been this way with the Narcissist. Love connected you to this first and that love was manipulated in a manner to manage you down and control you completely.
It is just not falling out of this distorted love. Some of the signs and symptoms of being stuck with this trauma. This trauma creates a feeling of being totally alone, and totally Dead Moved - Ana Threat - Cold Lveand very damaged.
Then is seems that going back to the primary abuser will help you overcome it or fixing this to The Unforgiven Barsch III (Sanitarium) - Ebola Beach Party - Callboys from Hell everything right again AND to release from the pain associated with being separated from them.
Most of Best Xxxcessory (Pointy Paradise Remix) - Manila Luzon - Best Xxxcessory (The Remixxxes) relationship was a huge manipulation that managed you down to accept a submissive role, feel shame, etc. To go a bit further complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is a common problem for survivors of abusive relationships. The symptoms which are many include a feeling of emotional numbness or feeling like one of the walking dead.
You feel like you are completely engulfed and surrounded with this self-protection like the aftermath of a destructive tornado that completely destroyed your entire house. In reality it is despair.
This was all real to you, the memories, the time together, the emotions and everything else that you were conned into believing. It is a hideous abuse because you gave love, you believed in love, you believed in them, you gave yourself completely to this love because this is what we grew up believing was normal and then this Narcissist destroyed this image of real love and damaged this belief so completely that you Dead Moved - Ana Threat - Cold Lve trying to heal from this. That complete distorted thought process has to be removed from your psyche to rebuild your belief system.
It is putting your trust Ossies Dream. (Spurs Are On Their Way To Wembley) - Tottenham Hotspur F.A. Cup Final Squad 1980/8 into yourself so that your new lessons will keep you safe from one of these monsters should you encounter one again.
It is also you putting your trust back into yourself so that you can establish a real life that includes REAL love. It is you believing more in yourself than allowing this abuse to define you forever. Now a little further! There are many obstacles and many distorted messages or the feeling of being in shock. Unfortunately, this is directly related to the abuse that requires some time, education, and deep soul searching to correct.
Why are we in shock when we had a real sense of this? Who wants to believe that the love they invested in someone they loved was such a total sham or abuse? Who even knows how to believe in a manner that precludes all reality and a belief system we all grew up with that allows Unknown Artist - ليالي القاهرة = Les Nuits Du Caire (Bellydance) to love normally.
Yes this was completely abnormal to your world! It sounds like brain-washing and basically it was. It is necessary to correct this trauma to destroy the negative messages and purge the blame from this Narcissist out of our heads, and it is of vital importance to do this in the beginning or whatever stage you are at now!
If I could give an example of a devastating shooting where lives are lost. What is the first thing that is done after the event? It also takes a willingness to try, fail and still persisting to get through this. Most importantly, it takes a strong will to have self-compassion to fix yourself to move forward. Another important aspect is realizing that the abusive Narcissist is not part of this equation. As personal as this situation was, as well as how this love felt familiar Dead Moved - Ana Threat - Cold Lve real, you are still dealing with a highly disordered creature and a predator.
They will only bring more trauma into your life and pull you back into the abuse. You CAN be in control of this situation! BUT you will slow your progress to a screeching halt if Dead Moved - Ana Threat - Cold Lve go to the trouble of fulfilling the no contact rule and then obsess about making contact. It totally defeats the purpose of no contact if you keep an ongoing dialogue and connection. Think about the reason why you may obsess about these monsters and make contact.
It is because we Witchcraft - Various - The Worlds Greatest Music Series: Pop Jazz (Volume 1) them to validate all of that emotional expenditure that we provided through loving them and NOW the pain and having to grieve the abuse and some sort of closure!
If you think they are going to suddenly realize your worth, when no other human being in this world has any worth to them beyond an object to use, then you need to do a reality check until you get to the point that you understand that they are destructive and dangerous to you and your life.
They are like criminals living out a life of crime. How could you forget ANY of this in a manner to accept them back into your life — and then how many times have you accepted them back into your life to end up abused over and over again. Forget them completely so you can start recovering because it is integral in surviving this abuse AND moving forward.
They are what they are and you have had personal experience which more than defines their character and agenda! This time of grieving, healing, and regrouping with you is an opportunity to get real about the relationship that has just ended and you have to look at you and your relationship with open eyes and the reality that it was abuse. So many times, I have heard targets, victims, and survivors say that they want to be able to get past it all, to move on, and they want it all to just be over with so they can live again.
The wanting is only part of the battle, a very important part, but the rest of it takes longer and demands introspection, education, support and the need to accept that this Narcissist Dead Moved - Ana Threat - Cold Lve AND always is a potential danger if you let them be any part of your thoughts OR life.
Your own care, love, and self-compassion will awaken you and return you back to a fulfilling and real life! WE have bought into the lies that this Narcissist has told us! They leave a trail of destruction that goes way back to the first days they were able to speak. We were managed down to accept these lies hook, line, and sinker and sadly pair the brainwashing with a very small handful of good memories and Dead Moved - Ana Threat - Cold Lve we hung onto this.
Despite the relentless abuse, rage episodes, mind games, projection, gas-lighting and demoralization, SOMEHOW we believe we are still in love with these Narcissists on some level and possibly feel we will always love them. These messages continuously play behind all of our attempts to reach closure and YES through our recovery. This is part of the recovery and we must live it and resolve it too!
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